Lack of Creativity

Lack of creativity is something that I have been dealing with for the last month. It's getting to the point where I'm slowly driven insane by the fact. You see, I need to do something creative to live, to feel, to survive. Without it, I'm nothing and the fact that I miss it is not helping.

This also includes writing to the creativity drain. It seems like just trying to think of something to write about is getting harder. And just staring at a blank page for hours at a time just hoping something will come and nothing will. I guess the first thing to do to get my creativity back to do try to attempt something creative.  Time to open Photoshop since God knows when and I just hope I can make something good.

More Life Ramblings

School today was pretty okay for me. Nothing really exciting happening to me today and thus meaning an average day for me. Basic Musicianship was short today for me since all we had was just a quiz to take. As for the quiz, to be honest I'm not sure how I did on it and all I keep thinking about is the final for that class and the amount of studying and practice work I will be doing for it. I do have to say that

English today was weird. Due to the fact that there is only three people (including me) in that class now since everyone dropped the course. Sure, I was expecting one or two people dropping the course but almost the whole class? Nothing I've seen before that's for sure. Anyway, since there are only three of us and the last few weeks of the class is going to spent working on our final we are now going to meet at elven to twelve on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Looks like there will be no more sleeping in on those days for me.

At least tomorrow is Friday and that's something to look forward to.

Of Fire and Inventions

There have been many different inventions that were very useful for this world. If I had the time, I could just name off plenty of them. Or at least the ones I can think from the top of my head at the moment. For me, there is one that I do believe was important for most inventions or the start of them.

Fire

Yes, like the wheel fire is important part of it. With the discovery of fire shows the growing intelligence the caveman had. It starts with natural instincts such as hunting and gathering. Ways of life to live and help them survive in the dog eat dog world. Fire starts off the evolution and starts on our way to be the people that we are. And with fire leads to more discoveries like the creation of the wheel. All in all, fire is important to us and in discoveries in general.

Urban Dictionalry Post Number Two

Why yes, here is another Urban Dictionary post! I have to say that only one today from me. But I have to say that this one is sure another classic. Or at least I do.

front-seat back-seat dilemma

The inability to decide which seat to take due to the quantity of friends both "kickin' in the front seat" and "sittin' in the back seat." Characterized by indecision and anxiety as the individual has "gotta make their mind up."

Because when we were twelve years old and driving cars, it was such a hard time to choose what seat to take. Don't you just hate it when that happens?

Of Time and Fast Food

The fast food article sure wasn't that hard for me to think of what to write about. To be quiet honest, I really don't know why people like it so much. Sure, once in a while I'll get something to eat there but I'm more likely to stop for some coffee to be quiet honest.

I guess when it comes to a quick meal, it would be the first thing someone can think of. Sure it saves time and its cheap if you are looking at the dollar menu. What I'm saying is if someone has the time to stop at some fast food place, then why don't they have the same time to find something to eat at home? Easy, because we are busy people and we don't have the time to do so. Try to find some time in a day to stop and slow down. Even if it is a few minutes to clear your head and catch your breath. It's a step and that is the best way to start.

Stupid Questions

I love it when someone decides to give out the statement on "There is no such thing as a stupid question". Well, that is a lie. There is such a thing about having a stupid question and the people who ask them. Sure, every once in a while we ask a stupid question ourselves but we are human and thus we are not perfect.  I've never asked any stupid questions but I know for a fact that I have thought up some during class and during my free time.

I guess you can say that there are many different categories of stupid questions that they can fall into. From the very little to the "How did you manage to pass elementary school" type. Over the years, I get less patient when it comes to these types of questions. Plus I guess it doesn't help that I don't understand people and I will never will. 

"On the outside I am calmer, inside I'm a freak, something from my darker side is forcing me to speak "

Today has been pretty eventful for me if I say so myself. Of course, school is usually eventful for me and I did register for my fall classes. If I pass everything I will take the following: English 102, Music Theory I, Music Theory Lab I, my bass lessons, Tech. of Audio Recording I and Human Sexuality. Mostly because I find it fascinating and it wouldn't hurt to learn more about it.

I had my written part of the CPR section in my first aid class today and it went pretty well. At least we won't have to work on CPR anymore and we can move onto other topics. But I still have to finish up on my project for that class that is due on Monday. Thankfully I picked depression and that is an easy and personal topic for me and if I'm lucky, I can finish it around Saturday night. Modern History was okay and the usual lectures with some video and sarcastic comments thrown in. I guess that's what makes the class a bit more enjoyable for me. Of course, any class that has sarcasm thrown in is a good class for me!

On Research Topics

Research topics, a very important thing to have when writing a paper. Over the years, I have learned about what topics to choose from when writing a paper that will keep your interest and not drive you insane. And I had had that one year of high school that I was driven insane from the term paper that I had to do and I never want to do anything on the August 5th bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki ever again.

They are important like a these statement to tell the audience what the paper is about and where it is going to. You also want to captivate the reader long enough to make your points and tell them what you think of the topic. Also, you have to remember not to shove it down their throats and you have to balance both sides of the issue and not be so worked up over the thing you believe in. That is why you have to keep an open mind when it comes to these things and the people too.

Of course there are some topics that I love to do a paper on. I think the top three topics if I had to choose that I would love to do are:

Animal Crulity
Depression
The Myths of the Gothic Subculture

'Motion-controlled' e-mail and other April Fools' Web pranks

Ah yes, April Fool's Day or as some like to call it National Gullibility Awareness Day. Today is a time where you try to pull off pranks on the internet to fool people. Or try to if I say so. I have to say this year for me was more reality than jokes and I just wish that the cops coming to my dorm room for a arrest warrant for one of my roommates was a joke. But I have to say that my last two days of being eighteen are going to be interesting.

For the internet to pull a prank, they usually do the same thing over and over. Most common is the I'm leaving this site and deleting my account trick that people do every year. As you can tell, that doesn't fool anyone who has known these pranks every year. From what I experience, people on the internet tend not to enjoy today and get really upset if they get pranked. People just don't have a sense of humor like they used to anymore. They just need to lighten up and not take things so seriously.

Stealing

Along with begging comes stealing. Yes, stealing and you did hear that right. Thinking about it, I guess in a way stealing is a factor in our life. You need to do just about anything to survive in this world. It's a dog eat dog world and if you are not prepared, they will eat you alive.

Of course, we are taught that stealing is bad and we will be punished for our actions. But you can't help but to be curious about when you are a child and you can't help but to try it just once. It is usually something simple like candy or a very small toy and when you get away with it makes you develop this rush and nothing can stop you. Until you are caught. Then you learn the consequences about your actions and they usually make you go back and tell them what you done and apologize to the person you stole from. We learn from our actions and that helps us grow as a person and help us learn what is right and what is wrong.

Stealing is an important part of our lives even if we don't want to admit it. But it is here to stay from now until who knows. 

Nothing cause I can't feel these thoughs of mine

Things have been okay for me during the last two days if I say so myself. If I have to say the best way to describe Thursday and Friday, I would have to say eventful. Yeah, eventful fits it very well but at least I can text Maire to make things better no matter how good or bad the day went. Of course she's one of my best friends so of course she can makes things better!

Thursday was something if I might add, okay most of Thursday was rather boring if I might like to add and nothing interesting happened. It just seems like that I've having plenty of quizzes lately in my classes. We did some review in my basic musicianship class since its been almost two weeks since our last class if I like to add. Didn't help that I had a pop quiz in that class and a test on Tuesday and that is just so wonderful. At least it was a good idea for me to stay after a little bit when class was over.

Today was okay, didn't help I have a fire drill at one in the morning and spent an hour at the school because someone burnt their food. People really need to learn how to cook and stop setting off the fire alarm. I had my first quiz in my first aid class and I did pretty good on it. And I know it since I ended up getting an 84 on it. I got another quiz on Monday on chapter five and I know for sure that I will be spending either some of Saturday or Sunday studying for it. But at least I learned how to take care of a person who is unconscious. We are not starting World War I in my modern history class by the wonderful drawing my teacher did and I think this will be one of the most interesting learning of World War I I have heard that's for sure.

Headlines

Headlines tend to be pretty important in our culture today. Mostly because it is advertisement and our society loves material things and getting them of course. It is the one of the most common way of showing off your product to the world.

Besides material goods, headlines are used in shows to show who is playing right now or in the near future. It gets your name out in the open to all and whoever passes by and sees it. All of us want fame, money and our name up in lights. To be on Broadway and to become a star is drilled into us by television and movies. To sum it up, we just want to be famous and why we as humans like headlines a lot.

A Rambling on Life

Well, things today have been pretty eventful if I do say so myself. Mostly just me doing work and studying for somethings that I have been pulling off lately. At leas I now know the topic I am doing for my Modern History essay exam tomorrow. Thank God the Industrial Revolution isn't hard to write an essay about for tomorrow.

Because of that, I forgot about a quiz in my basic musicianship class today and let me just say that I didn't do too well on it. So I had to stay after class along with the other people who didn't do well on it either. Because we are having trouble learning it or for me, I just forgot. Hey, it's easy to forget when you are working on a rough draft for English and studying for the Modern History essay exam all at the same time. Of course, I had to leave early since I had a conference with my English teacher and since its the same format as the ones I had in college composition, I'm pretty used to it.

The conference went by pretty quickly since it was just, look over the rough draft and talk about what the next paper is. I have to say, a compare and contrast paper isn't that hard, epically when the two things you are comparing are Duck Soup and Mars Attacks!. No, I don't think this will be a hard/complicated paper to work on. Or that's how I see it.

Sleepless Nights and Coffee

Ah yes, the weekend is here once again and it means one thing for me. Hello sleepless nights and my friend in the weekends, caffeine. Like every weekend, I know that I will be consuming a lot of the wonderful caffeine and who knows how much I drink. Maybe five to ten cups of coffee a day I guess. All I know that its more during the longer breaks that's for sure.

I guess I get the coffee love from my mom since she loves it a lot too. And it also helps drinking tons of it with my older sister growing up and winning every time since she can't stand the taste. Oh well, not everyone has to like coffee.

As for sleepless night, it just takes practice to get your body used to it. And it helps to be able to easily change your sleeping patterns. From sleeping in the night to just staying up until ten in the morning and not waking up until ten at night. And that just shows you are doing it correctly. Or at least that's how I see it. But this is someone who is a night owl typing this all up for a post.

Calling the whambulance. Whine-One-One.

Because nothing is more fun for the Urban Dictionary blog post than to do a popular term based on the internet. Okay, two since I can't choose between the both of them.

Word number one has to be the classic whambulance and that is the imaginary rescue vehicle that will rescue you from someone's incessant whining over a trivial matter. Used mockingly, but in good humor.

Ah yes, the whambulance, one of my personal favorites that I like to use once in awhile. The best way to describe it is a term we use to describe (in a sarcastic way) some stupid pointless drama people complain about. And yes, I have use this term in public before and I'm not ashamed to admit that.

The second one has to the all time guilty pleasure I do on the internet is trolling.

Trolling is trying to get a rise out of someone. Forcing them to respond to you, either through wise-crackery, posting incorrect information, asking blatantly stupid questions, or other foolishness. However, trolling statements are never true or are ever meant to be construed as such. Nearly all trolled statements are meant to be funny to some people, so it does have some social/entertainment value.

"Trolling" isn't simply "harmful statements". Intentionally insulting/libelous statements are "flaming".

Just as bad as trolling is "Feeding the Trolls". This is when people say stuff that they know will prompt someone to respond with a trolled reply and/or replying to comments that are blatantly from a troll. This is especially true when a troll first makes his comment/reply, and (usually many) people respond, either trying to correct the troll, or express anger at the statement. At that point, the trolling was successful and has been fed. When encouraged by success and feeding, trolls often return.

In World of Warcraft, there are occasionally people that blurt out in world chat, "You get your mount at level 40 and costs 100 gold." then immediately signs off.

This information is outdated by over a year; but MANY people respond for at least 10-15 minutes afterwards with either corrections or calling that player a 'dummy', or something similar insulting their intelligence.

Trolling is just to mock and start drama on message boards to cause buthurt (another popular internet term) and get the people ticked off in a heated flame war. My God, I love trolling certain sites and that does include the many Justin Bieber chat sites. In honestly, it's like taking candy from a baby and they get offended very easily. 

I hate the Snow

Have I ever mention that I hate the snow? Yes, I really do hate the snow a lot. I never was a fan of this season and I prefer spring and the rain to be honest. Anything is just about better than snow, even extreme hot days are better than this. And I hate the hot days.

Don't get me wrong, snow is pretty. During the month of December is the only month that snow is pretty and magical. After or before that is just a huge mess. All that slush, ice, wind is not something I enjoy all mixed together. Also the cold, who can't forget the cold. That is one of the biggest things I hate about this weather, the cold. I dislike the cold and I dislike the extreme heat and I guess you can say that I like the warm, foggy or rainy days the most.

Not to mention going out in it is the worst. All the hassle doesn't seem worth the trip to anywhere and not to mention the dangers. Just the thought of it makes me shudder as I type this.

An Ode to Comedy

What is comedy? There is many different ways to describe comedy. According to the dictionary I have in my dorm,  comedy is defined as a humorous play, ect. with a non-tragic ending or an amusing event. Looking over at the definition, to does make perfect sense about what a comedy is and how to describe it to the best of their abilities.  But it doesn't answer the most important question I can think of.

What does comedy mean to you.

For me, comedy is a stress reliever for us and it put us in a good mood. Like most movies and plays, comedy distracts you from the horrors of the real world and for a short while, helps you forget about the issues you have.  It helps you escape your life and temporarily enter another one of the comedy.  A comedy makes our life more enjoyable and of course puts us in a good mood. Besides, who doesn't like anything that puts us in a good mood when we have a bad day?

What I mean is that its good to have a laugh in our day when things get tough. It just makes your day a little bit better and makes life less dark. So don't be afraid to laugh when the going gets tough and take some time to watch something funny.

Shoes and Puppies

I guess there are many different reasons why I wear shoes. There is the common one, we wear them to protect our feet from harmful objects and from the ever changing weather. We also wear them as clothing when we want to go somewhere and we don't want to go to the place barefoot anyway. So we must have to put on shoes when we go somewhere out of our house.

Because we all want to go barefoot to a place where who knows what's been on the floor and that's just public restrooms.

I guess I wear them to protect my feet from playful animals in my house and there has been times where I've became the chew toy for them. I now have to keep an eye on shoes in general now since Bella loves to drag them to the living room and start to chew on them. I will be happy once her chewing stage is over, now that I think about it I will be happy when she gets out of the puppy stage. Too bad labs puppy stage lasts two to three years.

I will be picking up shoes off the floor for the next few years if my mom's boyfriend would just stop her from doing that since it is his dog. But it just makes me wonder how the house lasts without me doing everything during the week.

The Saddest Day of Joe Bob Rainey

Walls, all you could see is walls. Walls that show history and the peeling rusted wallpaper is collected on the floor.  Just adding to the mixtures and broken concert floor pieces and dried up blood from past residents.  Past residents who stayed in the room, who slept in the only bed and used the only bathroom in here.

Screams and cries can he heard from the other cells. Some came from the tortures from the doctors trying to "cure" them from their illness or banish the devil out of them. Others screamed from the tortured visions and nightmares their own minds created that they can't control. And for a few, screaming was their only was of communicating to one another.

Bodies come and go each day, gaining and losing the ill and taking them out without others knowing. You have to wonder where do the bodies go here. Who knows, but you just can't ignore the smell of it for too long.

There are plenty of children here and it is quite a shame to see them. Playing games and running around like normal children. Too bad they are so ill with their own sicknesses.

And here's Joe, sitting here looking at the walls of his cell. Looking too happy and I don't think even he knows he is in here. I guess that's the best way to go, trapped in your own delusions.

But here in the insane ward, who isn't mad here?

"Inch worm, inch worm - always measuring"

I've been listening to a lot of Black Tape for a Blue Girl since I just recently got into them thanks to my good friend. I do have to say that their music is pretty good and I love the mixture between male and female vocalists.  Plus they are one of the most well known Darkwave acts so how can I not check them out?

Maybe the reason I decided to check them out because back in October Valerie Gentile joined the group. Before you do ask, I do know her and I saw her perform back in 2008 when she was in CXS. To sum it up, she's an awesome guitarist that is all. I finally found the time and I didn't forget this time to get one of Black Tape for a Blue Girl's albums.

The one I have, 10 Neurotics is pretty enjoyable to listen to. If you are into Gothic music of course.

Riddle Me This Batman

What if the sun refused to shine?
What if the clouds refused to rain?
What if the wind refused to blow?
What if the seas refused to wave?
What if the world refused to turn?
What if the stars would hesitate?

What if, what is isn't true?
What are you going to do?
What if, what is isn't you?
Does that mean you've got to lose?
Digging for the feel of something new- "Appels + Oranjes" by Smashing Pumpkins

You can't help to think about it when it is late at night and you are all alone. Questions like these can keep you thinking through out the night where all you want to do is to rest. And this is coming from a person who experience these thoughts just about every night I try to go to bed. Or its my good friend insomnia.  Well it is one of the two options.

These questions have no answers and many possibilities on your own point of view on what would happen.  Just like the possibilities, there is also your own sense of mood of the whole issues. From serious to humorous,  it just depends on what the mind creates. Yes, everything comes back to the mind.

It is mind over matter after all. We create what others can't and no one else can make duplicates of our own personal creations. I guess that makes us unique and different and it shows how we interpenetrate a question given to us.  Or that's how I tend to see it. Anyway, there is no answers to the questions we think of but it won't stop us from thinking them.

Too weird for the normal, too normal for the weird

It seems that I trend of the Friday night posts are always done while watching Ghost Adventures. I always amazed that I get these ones done since I usually get distracted when writing theses. But that's what I get for being weird and strange!

Now that I think about it, the best way to describe me is too weird, too normal. Yeah, that fits very well and I have to say some of the things that I like tend to creep people out. A good example has to be my love for asylums and my wish to spend one night in one even though I know the dangers of them.  I believe in spirits, ghosts,  extraterrestrials and also inkubus and  sukkubus. Of course the common thing I like ever since I was little was anime (not to the extent of an Otaku). 

Another thing that I love are cult films and my favorite one has to be Repo! The Genetic Opera. I'm also a huge sucker for musicals and the one that you will most likely catch me listening to is the Spring Awakening soundtrack. One thing that I really would love to try is human suspension and that is hanging the human body from (or partially from) hooks pierced through the flesh in various places around the body. I've always find that rather interesting and strangely attracting.

Being Batty Never Hurt Anyone

As things come to mind, I have been asked many different questions about the Gothic lifestyle. You have to admit that almost eight years since I started the lifestyle ( yes a lifestyle, not a phase) it just gets old and trying to answer the same old questions. That does include the common things people think and hear about Goths.

Thus the site that will help people understand us more and will get rid of the modern myths of Goths. Here at Gothic Charm School! Yes, a Charm School and its based on the same book and site creator The Lady of the Manners herself Jillian Venters.  If you are wondering, yes I do own the book and it is sitting right next to me as I type it.

Gothic Charm School gives out advise on all sort of things Goths go through everyday and what we have to deal with. She also have a few posts describing the myths that people think about Goths. But the most important thing that I like about it is the manners factor. Yes manners, and that does include how to treat people nicely and not get all upset over the simplest of things. Like questions for an example. It is an excellent read for people who want to know more about Goths in general.

"The only thing I ever wanted was...."

To be accepted and if I remember right,  this would be taken from my elementary school days sadly. I time where I don't want to remember due to the loads of bad memories that I experienced. Well, I did get that wish but it wasn't until high school when my peers finally accepted me for who I am.

Let me just say this, I believe that the main reason for the teasing I went through was my religion. Yes, I was teased because of my religion. Kids are cruel and they don't understand the other religions unless it is the common ones they grew up to knowing. I'm not ashamed to be a part of the religion since I grew up to it and when my mother decided to go back to being a Christian when I was ten, I didn't want to take a part of it.

Now as I see it I don't care if I dress in mostly black, being a bookworm, being strange and too weird, too normal. I would have cared and even cried at all of the teasing when I was eight and just hoping that one day that I would be accepted. Hoping and waiting does take out a lot in a person and I'm just glad that I can push the past aside.

Expantations

I do have some high expectations of myself when it comes to certain things. From to school to life, I tend to put myself in high regards and never giving up. Now that I think about it, it makes me pretty determined and stubborn most of the time. 

Most of it is passing my classes and not having to take a class over or summer school (and I have to say that so far in my school life, I only failed one class). I really don't know why I tried that hard. Maybe it is the fact that I don't want to disappoint my parents, no matter how many times they tell me that they are proud of me no matter what. I guess that's always a relief to me since I always had to work harder in school unlike my older sister.

I guess that makes me more determined in life in general and I guess that helps me become a stronger person. I'm already a strong person but I would like to become a little bit stronger. Both mentally and spiritually. Who knows what the future leads, I sure know I don't.

"And all my bones began to shake, my eyes flew open"

"No more dreaming like a girl so in love with the wrong world." - "Blinding" by Florance and the Machine

That song sums me up a lot if I say so myself. Now that I think about it, what you went through growing up shapes who you are and how you act. I guess you can say that thanks to medication I take, it helps me to open up and enjoy the world a lot more. Yes, you read it right I take medication.

Anti-depressants to be exact. 

Yes I am clinically depressed and lucky me it runs in the family (both sides to be exact) and I admit that this takes a lot to come out in the open about it and I think its high time to get in the mind of Sarah Adams.  Trust me, I wouldn't coming out of this in front of everyone but I trust you guys and trust me, I don't trust easily.

First off, my childhood wasn't all the great due to me not having any friends and the bullying I got through out my elementary school years. I really didn't start to make any friends until my fourth grade year and the few friends I have that went to my school are the people I would sacrifice my life for. I also learned though elementary school that I should never trust anyone since if I did, I would get hurt and even today I still have trouble trusting people.

I'm not all that open due to the teasing and having people judged me with the things I like and why I am not like everyone else. It still hurts me when I think about it but over the years  I've learned to accept and to love being too weird, too normal.  Besides, being like everyone else is boring.

The depression is something I had for the last five years (six this up coming May) and this is the month where is started to happen back in 2007. Those were the dark times for me and I had no motivation and losing hope every day. I guess having a mental breakdown in your bathroom was the final straw and thus the trip to the doctor's to get diagnosed with depression and social anxiety. What a lovely combination no? I still do suffer from the social anxiety but I take it one day at a time.

I guess that now gives a little insight of my life. Just only a little slice since I still have a lot of mystery in me that I'm not ready to share but this is one step for me. To get a better feeling of this post, check out "Blinding" by Florance and the Machine to get you in the mood.

Memories

First of all, the song does have important part in telling the story and it goes along with my favorite memory. There is a back story that is long and personal but to sum it up, in October 2008 when I was in eleventh grade a classmate died in a car crash and the driver (the one driving) was drunk. Let's just say that a few days after he died was when I discovered The Crüxshadows.

There is just way too much to describe how this band means so much to me and why I love them so much but that would just be me rambling. Anyway, on November 22nd 2008 they came here for their first show in Rochester at Water Street Music Hall and I manage to convince my mother on Halloween to buy the tickets so we can go.  We left there 6:20 at night and we got there just around seven. When we got there, we were the only ones that stand out from the rest of the crowd (and only a few people to bring coats since it was freezing outside). There was another two people who were behind us and when we got inside they were asking if another band played today and if it was the 22nd. I had to tell them that the 22nd was yesterday and they ended up running out.

There wasn't that many people as I thought it would be and I ended up getting a shirt and I "took" one of the fliers from the bulletin board that was up there.  I got front row again since I quickly decided to go up before the other people came. The first band that played was I: Scintilla and they were pretty good. And I loved the female vocals she had. The second one, The Azoic was good also and they started the dancing off for the people in the back (it was very amusing to watch and I do admit that every time I go to a show, there is always that guy who dressed up as Jesus there).

At ten, The Crüxshadows finally came on stage and that's when the fun began. The dancers were wonderful, the music was awesome, and the energy that Rogue brought made everything work out. I was very happy that the fourth song they played was "Sophia" (my favorite song by them)and it was just too awesome. I loved the part when Rogue started to move around the bar in the middle of the song. "Dragonfly" was wonderful and I have to say that I had my eyes glued to the dancers. The green lights were also very cool and fit the song well. They also did "Souls" (another one of my favorites) and the live version made it a nice touch to the song.

I got excited when they started to play "Deception" and that was very entertaining. The reason for it to be very entertaining because Rogue started to dance with the crowd and they started to go in circles. I liked his little talk about snow here and the hurricanes in Florida. My favorite line has to be "The problem with hurricane warnings is that no one takes them seriously. Oh look it's a warning, you have work tomorrow." "Winterborn" was very nice, I like the feeling of the stage felt and the moves made it a stronger feel.

They ended up playing two encore songs at the end and they were two of my favorites. The first one they played was "Monsters" and I love it even better live. I think it has to do with the flashlights and the few lights on. The final song they played was "Marilyn My Bitterness" and that was awesome! Out of pure luck, JoHanna ended up picking me to go on stage with the other group of people. Overall, I had a wonderful time and I have some pics. I saved the best one for last after the last song was over.

Oh the Places you Will Go

Growing up in the small country town of Caledonia, I always wanted to go somewhere outside of the small town where everyone knows who you are. Where everyone knows your business and is everyone's relative (I'm thankful that my mother didn't grow up here and moved here when my sister was in first grade).

It started with the desire of going anywhere where I'm just another person that no one knows and have never even heard of. I love the thrill of traveling to New York City last summer and going to Florida when I was nine and those trips just keep me craving for more. Of course even just going to Rochester for the day even excites me since I've been there so many times and I never get bored of it. Well, there is one place in Rochester that I love ever since going there for the first time when I was sixteen.

Water Street Music Hall that is located in North Water Street in Rochester. The best way to describe it is a well known club that has performances of local and well known talents. The dark lighting, the warm atmosphere, the music and of course the people is why I love it so much. The people are very friendly and like everyone else is here to have a good time and to enjoy the music. I met wonderful people there and I cherish the memories I gain there.

So come out to one of Goth shows and there is a good chance that I will be there! 

Objects Brings out Thoughts of the Past

It's funny how listening to "A Night Like This" by The Cure for the last hour makes you want to learn the bass parts for it.

Now it comes to the thought of my bass in general sitting here right next to my desk here at the dorms in its bag waiting for me to take it out and play it. Either for fun or for the lessons I have to take for my major so I guess its continuously on my mind. Not surprising that music is my life.

I take a glance at the bass I had ever since I was fourteen and nothing much has changed for it. It's a Fender P bass that I admire when I first saw it in Guitar Warehouse in Rochester years ago and I have to say that its still in good condition. The black paint is still on it, the wooden neck is still on there and the strings haven't failed me yet. Also, thank God the strings or the black strap haven't break yet.

I guess my bass has never left my side since high school and like music, has helped me through all the ups and downs and over the years have become very important to me. I can't help but to think back on what my life was like before getting it and how my life is now with it. Thanks to my bass, I can say that it helped me out in choosing my college major.

The Art of Begging

In some sort of strange way, begging is part of our own life. We beg to survive, we beg because we want something and we beg because we can.  We tend to like having the feeling of getting something that we want that we can't afford and I do think that there is an art when it comes to begging. 

Yes, everything that we do can count as some sort of art form and the idea of mastering this can be useful. You just have to be a good persuader to other people. You must plan out the course of the attack on how one might do it without being discovered. If discovered, thinking of a way to get out of the situation is a lot harder than it looks. Plus, it might put some strain in the relationship you have with that individual.

Thus the action must be a intellectual one. You must become the hunter, looking for the prey and beating them in their own game. It isn't hard to become an intellectual beggar,  it just takes some time to think it out. Before doing it, I advise you to think it over and decide if the object you want is worth risking someone's good hearten nature.  If you do remember this, not every person is a fool.